Anxiety update

Hey, guys. How’s everyone doing?

I’m not sure how many people stop by my blog anymore because I hardly post anymore, but I figured it might be good to post an update. I was once a very active member of the book blogging community and, truth be told, I miss it so much it hurts.

I haven’t been blogging for a few reasons, but the main reason has been my mental health. My anxiety has been gradually worsening over the past three or four months and things came to a head about a month ago when I had an episode which saw me having to have a week of university to go home because I’d called my grandparents, hysterical, having been unable to both sleep or eat because I was so anxious.

Long story short, I’ve been trying to get back on my feet and trying to take care of myself. At my last doctor’s appointment, I was prescribed some SSRIs (a specific type of antidepressant which can also help with anxiety disorders) to trial for a month. I also had my first counselling appointment last week. I’m hoping I might finally start being on the up soon. I really, really hope so. I’m exhausted if I’m honest.

These are probably details people aren’t interested in but it’s my blog and I want to be honest about my mental health. Too often people feel ashamed to talk about their mental health out of fear of judgment, but illnesses such as anxiety and depression are just as real and as valid as any other.

When I’ll be back to regular blogging I can’t say, but I do miss you guys. I know I’m not the podcast-making, book-blogging, flash fiction-writing annoying person that I used to be but that person is still here somewhere, underneath everything that’s happening at the moment. If anyone wants a catch up or anything, feel free to drop me a message, either on Facebook or on Instagram.

Jazz x

28 thoughts on “Anxiety update

  1. Hey friend, it’s good to hear from you, even if the news isn’t the happiest. Glad to hear that you’re taking care of yourself, though! Anxiety and depression are tough monsters to fight, but it sounds like you’re doing a good job finding the right people and being active about looking for solutions. Keep it up!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you and I’m sorry that I’ve been so bad with emailing these past couple of months! I’m really hoping that everything that I’ve been doing will be the start of a positive change and that things will be on the up from this point forward. Hope all is good with you across the pond!

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  2. Take care of yourself! That’s priority one. Don’t worry about us at all! We’ll wait until you’re ready to be active again, whatever the level (if at all – no pressure, no judgement from us!) Your posts, whatever you feel like sharing, are wonderful and appreciated but not an obligation. We’re there for you either way. It sound like you’re doing the right things to get through this.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much for your kindness and understanding ❤ I think that's some of my problem; I'm always feeling guilty which can make me feel worse, when in actuality, everyone is a lot more understanding than I give them credit for ❤ ❤ ❤

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you ❤ There's been a few bumps in the road so far, but I think for the most part I'm finally on the up. I think recognising that I needed help has really helped.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I do miss you terribly, but have to say that I am happy to hear you are taking time to do what needs done for you. I am sorry that you are fighting this nattle right now but keep at it! And thank you for lending a voice to mental health awareness. It is so important that we all acknowledge how real and difficult anxiety and depression are. Love you my friend. Message if ever you want or need 💕

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Love right back at you ❤ As much as I miss blogging and talking to you guys near enough every day, I think right now I need to get to grips with this so I can return to it as my usual self. I'm really hoping that I'm on the right track now and that things will start to pick up ❤
      I always like to be open and honest about it. As you've both said and know, anxiety and depression are very real and I want anyone reading my blog who feels like that to know that they're not alone and that it's okay to talk about it ❤

      Liked by 3 people

      1. That actually made me tear up ❤ I started my medication today so I'm hoping in the next few weeks I might start feeling a fraction more whole again. Again, thank you for your continued love and support. It's crazy – in a good way – how much love I get from this community. Hope all is good with you ❤ ❤ ❤

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    1. Thank you for understanding, Sarah ❤ Writing has always helped. I'm currently keeping an anxiety journal and spilling my feelings out onto paper is always a relief ❤

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  4. Hey, posting this blog and being honest about the way anxiety impacts on your life is not just courageous but helps support others who struggle too, and for that, you should be really proud of yourself. None of us can do all things at all times, and having the insight to take some time off and look after you, giving yourself permission to rest and not worry about deadlines, self-imposed or otherwise, is the often the quickest way to recovery. People who support your blog support you and I imagine we would all rather you took the time to get yourself feeling a bit better rather than have you pressure yourself. Trust in yourself, these things are so hard but tend to come in waves and this wave will pass. You’re doing it all right xxx

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for your words of support (and for your add on Facebook). I really appreciate it ❤ One of the reasons I'm honest about my mental health is because, as you said, it helps support others too. Anxiety has made me feel like the loneliest person in the world sometimes and if anyone who reads my blog feels or has ever felt like that, I want them to know that they're not alone. I've always found that knowledge can make the road ahead seem less daunting.
      You've hit the nail on the head. A lot of it is about giving myself permission to rest, which isn't something I've always found easy. I'm very much a person who feels the need to always being doing something and when I don't, I very often feel guilty which can add to the anxiety. Seeing the support I've received in response to this post has really helped, though. People have been so understanding and they really eases the guilt. I love blogging, but I need to put myself first.
      I hope that you're right and this is just a wave that will soon subside. This is the longest episode I've ever had and I think a lot of it is to do with university. I keep reminding myself of the times I have felt good, though. I know I can find those feelings again and I've nearly finished the second semester so hopefully I'll feel much better when I complete my studies.
      Thank you again xxx

      Liked by 2 people

      1. ❤️ University does pile the pressure on, and all the expectations (often self-imposed) that come with it. I know so many people at Uni now that are struggling with it, it’s a huge transition and just adds to the pressure to perform. Having said that it can also be the most liberating experience where you find your tribe. It just takes a while. I’m sure you will feel better when you finish your studies, but goodness me – Uni and a blog and all the other life stuff too, no-one can do it all. You sound super switched on and I wish you all the best. Plus you’re a book lover, how can you not be a queen 😉 The joy of not knowing people in RL is that you can say anything you like, so now we’re fb connected feel free to just Raaaaahhh in my inbox. I won’t always get back to you straight away, but I’m happy to be an ear. No reply needed. Rest. xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Sproggy! See, no matter how long the gap between the blog posts you post the name of Sprog/Sproggy/Sproglet will endure and stand the test of time!😂

    Though maybe as it has been ssssssoooooooooooo long Sprog isn’t really appropriate and perhaps you’ve aged. Maybe, Srogager??🤔😂

    If people have stopped following and/or don’t read your blog anymore due to the lack of posts then simply put, f#ck them. Though from seeing all the comments on the post it doesn’t look like many have.

    I’m late coming to the post as I took the weekend off from blogging which is why I’m only getting to reading and commenting now.

    Chin up, you’ll get there, helping yourself and doing what is right and best for you is the most important thing.

    Blogging and stuff like it is just a hobby, focus on getting back to being your young self (obviously, someone so young can’t have an old self.😂) and then come back to blogging when you can.😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. To assume I’ve aged is downright sprogagist 😛
      I think I always have the worry that people will. I used to be a relatively active member of the book blogging community and it seems so weird not being anymore. I sometimes worry that when I eventually return to it properly, it might not be the same because everyone would have moved on. It’s a stupid worry, but you’re right. The comments on this post have showed me that that is far from the truth and it’s wonderful that everyone has been so supportive and understanding. It’s crazy how much love and understanding you can feel from a group of people you’ve never actually met!
      I know it’s just a hobby, but it became such a huge part of my life and when I stopped having so much time for it, it almost felt like a part of my identity had been stripped away as dramatic as that sounds. Going back to the comments, though, I can now remind myself that I will return to it, my absence isn’t permanent and that when I do, everyone will still be here 🙂
      Ah you say I can’t have an old self but I’m but months away from being officially in my *whispers* late 20s! 😂

      Liked by 2 people

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