Maaaaan, I feel like I’ve been away from I swoon over fictional, non-human men for a century. I’d gotten so used to writing at least one review per week that it feels weird to not have posted anything substantial in the past week or more! *tentatively steps into the light* Well, hello again, my dear fellow bookworms! How are you all? Everyone had a good Christmas?

I thought I’d ease back into things by compiling a simple list of my top 5 fictional boyfriends. Well *laughs sheepishly* I say simple. I’ve gotta whittle down my entire harem of fictional men to a mere five.

Let’s leave the best until last and start with number five.

5. Loke (Taken by a Dragon by Felicity Heaton)

Sure, this gorgeous dragon shifter finds himself somewhat perplexed by mortal women but he is an absolute sweetheart. He’s caring, tender and protective…and not at all overbearing (and for once I’m not being sarcastic when I say that). Oh and he also lives in a cave with an awesome view. Truth be told, though, a would-be lover might not actually get to experience the joy of sitting at the cave mouth and watching the sun set beyond the mountains. Anais tries to do this at one point in the book and gets kidnapped. So, yeah…perhaps not. Still, Loke definitely deserves a place in my top five.

Not quite actual footage of Anais being kidnapped but close enough.

4. Lucian (Lucian Divine by Renee Carlino)

Despite being a guardian angel, Lucian is actually very down-to-earth. There’d be no feelings of inferiority while in the company of this celestial being. He’s mortal in so many ways and I feel that out of every guy on this list, Lucian is the most relatable. It wouldn’t all be flying through the skies and battling arch enemies. It would be mostly snuggling up on the sofa and watching movies. Sometimes that’s all I need.

Perfect date

3.  Gideon (Lords of the Underworld series by Gena Showalter)

A strange choice perhaps since I haven’t actually read his book yet, but I feel life with Gideon would be a bundle of laughs. He’s keeper of Lies and as a result, everything he says is the exact opposite of what he means. I can just imagine him approaching a woman in a nightclub, completely and utterly captivated by her beauty, leaning in close, and whispering in a husky voice “You’re so ugly.” Perhaps I’m weird but I think the challenge of learning his reverse language would keep me sufficiently amused. But there’s so much more to this blue-haired bad-boy-but-not-really. In Sabin’s book, there are a few chapters describing events from Gideon’s perspective and so much is revealed. For one, he cares deeply for his friends and fellow Lords and this unwavering loyalty is something I can’t help but admire. Furthermore, despite not having Maddox’s death curse or Lucien’s unavoidable soul duties, Gideon has endured so much shit since Lies’ possession of him. It just makes me want to bundle him into my bed *cough* I mean, arms, and give him a good ol’ hug. Congratulations for making into my top five, Gideon. Bet you feel honored.

Gideon, Lord of Lies and Awesome Hair

2. Ares (Ares by Felicity Heaton)

Ah Ares. The latest addition to my harem.He has a motorbike and he sits around eating pizza. Oh and he can teleport. Combined, these three things nearly make my perfect man.

Ares when he first arrived in the mortal realm.

1. Illium (Guildhunter series by Nalini Singh)

But the word ‘nearly’ is crucial because no man, fictional or not, compares to Illium, aka Bluebell. *cackles* Who did you think would be my number one? Illium is both a character in Nalini Singh’s Guildhunter series and a regular in my date night features (I sincerely hope that the latter isn’t copyright infringement). Illium is perfection. Never mind the fact that he’s breathtakingly beautiful, he’s also a powerful, well-respected warrior and a valued member of Raphael’s Seven. Additionally, he has a cracking personality. He’s playful, flirtatious and possesses a heartwarming sense of humor. However, it’s not all fun and games for Bluebell. He can turn on the scary without a moment’s thought or hesitation and it’s these traits that make him my number one. He’s the kindest, most selfless angel while among his loved ones, but he’s the fiercest of warriors when said loved ones are endangered. His loyalty is unquestioned and his abilities are endless. I need to stop here before I write a freaking sonnet about him *swoons*

Actual footage from my first encounter with Illium