I figured since I’ve already done a Date Nights feature with the lovely Raphael, I’d change things around a bit and write one featuring the goddess of death herself, Lijuan! Enjoy 😉 This is pre-Beijing’s destruction FYI.
There you are! *grabs you and uses you as a human shield* The men just weren’t cutting it, huh? Well, that’s fine and all but…did you have to opt for a date with freaking Lijuan!? *shudders as a Reborn scuttles in the shadows* Okay, Jazz, you just got to breathe, Illium will be here any second for you, don’t worry *laughs hysterically* Don’t worry!? This archangel would probably kill us simply to provide some post-dinner entertainment. Oh lord *shoves you forward* Quick, in this courtyard *whirls you around and grabs your shoulders* You need to listen and you need to listen hard. Okay? This might be your last date, like, ever because date nights with Lijuan will probably/definitely include…
- Her gifting you with the replica of a necklace belonging to one of your deceased relatives.
- Some light entertainment courtesy of a few members of her Reborn army. And when I say light entertainment, it could be anything from a Reborn edition of the bully who tormented you in school to a few Reborn tearing a vampire limb from limb and feasting upon his flesh. No two dates are ever the same with dear Lady Lijuan.
- Lijuan showing you her collection of dead butterflies, telling you which butterflies remind her of which angels. All I can say is don’t let our beautiful Bluebell near that woman.
- Her tickling your cheek with her hair that floats creepily upon a non-existent breeze. If she’s feeling playful. If.
- You feeling awkward as Lijuan watches you eat. Lijuan’s tastes are somewhat *clears throat uncomfortably* other.
- Lijuan getting bored of you and feeding you to a Reborn.
- Or killing you herself, lest you evoke feeling in her cold, dead immortal heart and render her *horrified gasps* a teeny tiny bit mortal.
- You running away. Or trying to at least.
- You begging another member of the Cadre to save you.
- You realizing an eternity with Neha or Michaela would be preferable over this.
*whispering as I see Lijuan floating silently towards us* Forget fun, just stay alive *gets enveloped in darkness and shadows as Jason takes pity and retrieves me*
Check out my review for Archangel’s Kiss.